Would you rather...?

You.

Would you rather have limitless pizza, any flavour you like, any size, any time of day and any place you are, OR have sex for 2 hours with the female of your choice, and she'll do anything and everything.

Pizza, because 2 hours isn't enough time and if you can't have her again then you'll contemplate about her with every girl you're with afterwords.

Would you rather get a free trip to the Caribbean alone or go on a crazy road trip with all your friends?

Road trip, if I could scrunge up the number of friends for it. 

Would you rather be stuck in a prison cell with Biohazard or with Fred Phelps?

Biohazard. The conversations would be more entertaining. For a while.

Would you rather meet me or Scalinger in person?

Pacman.
Cuz you're already my bitch.

Would you rather have no hands or no feet.

No hands, so I could then surgically attach another pair of feet instead and run around on four legs an- hm, then again, it would make certain private activities a bit more difficult to perform without hands. Like twister.


Would you rather get kicked in the groin or punched hard in the stomach?

Punched hard in the stomach.

Would you rather die while suffering or not?

Well, if I want to die, I at least want it to be interesting, unlike when someone dies from an allergic bee sting, so a ridiculous agonizing death would be my choice.

Would you rather have to swallow a small cactus or walk across an old shaky bridge?

I WOULD RUN ACROSS THAT BRIDGE LIKE A BAUS.

Final Fantasy or Kingdom Hearts?

Final Fantasy
Would you rather never have to sleep, or never have to eat?

Never have to sleep. I enjoy food so much.

Would you rather live on an untouched, distant Earth-like planet with no other humans but with plants and animals or live in a 7ft x 7ft underground room with an unlimited supply of instant ramen, a toilet and a sink with a person of your choosing? This is for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!!!

If there's marijuana, then I would choose the other planet. If there isn't any, then I choose the room. Fuck the police.

Would you rather fuck the police, and get fucked by the police?

Fuck the police.

Would you rather get shot through the head or through the heart?

Through the head; I'd die quicker.

Would you either eat a crocodile or an alligator?

A crocodile.

Would you rather rob a bank or kill you're rich family?

I don't know how to "kill you are rich family" so I'll go with that one.

Would you rather eat a chocolate or vanilla cupcake?

Chocolate all the way *******

Would you rather have a 500 degree fahrenheit metal rod shoved up your ass or have someone smash your hand with a sledgehammer?

bones heal easier than burns also probably hurt less.

would you rather get down to business (to defeat the huns) or whistle while you work?

Well, time is racing forward (till the Huns arrive), so I should get down to business.

Carmen Electra or Pamela Anderson, but they both have a yeast infection.

Did they send you daughters, when you asked for sons?

Ahem. Death.

Never use the internet again or lose your ability to talk?

Uh that's a pretty easy choice there, cap. I'll go with being able to talk.

Would you rather bang Arlen all you want for 24 hours, or spend a week long vacation with Anski.

Spoiler for:

You can't bang Anski

FIRST OPTIONA DASJDLADM

Ahem. I mean, whatever.

Cake or death?

Cake.

Do you still have cake or are you all out?

We're all out I'm afraid. Seems like everyone chooses cake

Would you rather be a fat nerd or a weaboo?

Eh, I could go with either one and be alright. I'm already pretty weird as is. *flips a coin*

Would you rather have small individual Cornish hens for Thanksgiving, or a single large roast ham?