RMRK is retiring.
Registration is disabled. The site will remain online, but eventually become a read-only archive. More information.

RMRK.net has nothing to do with Blockchains, Cryptocurrency or NFTs. We have been around since the early 2000s, but there is a new group using the RMRK name that deals with those things. We have nothing to do with them.
NFTs are a scam, and if somebody is trying to persuade you to buy or invest in crypto/blockchain/NFT content, please turn them down and save your money. See this video for more information.
[Writing] Mama [This story has the official M00s Schtampf of approval!]

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

RMRK's Mom
Level 88
I intend to live forever - so far so good.
2014 Most Missed Member2013 Most Mature Member2013 Kindest Member2013 Best Counsel2013 Queen of RMRKBronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer2012 Best Counsel2012 Kindest Memberluv u bb <3Secret Santa 2012 ParticipantFor taking a crack at the RMRK Wiki2010 Kindest Member

Her face was completely relaxed with just a hint of a smile playing at the corners of her mouth. She was lying on a board covered with a sheet, and another sheet was pulled up to her chest. You could see the outline of her arms beneath the sheet crossed over her chest. A bible lay on her stomach, unmoving. 

They say when someone dies, they look as if they are asleep. I've even said that myself. “Oh he looked like he was sleeping” But she didn't look like she was sleeping. She looked at peace, finally. During the last few months of her life, her sleep had been interrupted constantly by sighs, moans, tossing, and turning as she tried to find a spot that was comfortable. But there had been a war raging inside her body and there were no satisfactory positions left to sleep in. Everything hurt, every where hurt. 

There was no mahogany coffin with a velvet interior and a plump pillow. Her head lay on a flat pillow, similar to the one she had carried around with her always. It was her favorite. Ashes to ashes and dust to dust, she'd decided to be cremated. No sense in a fancy burial; she wouldn't be there and it would only cost us money no one had. But we would have gladly spent it, had she wanted one. I couldn't stay there long, looking at her. I knew she was better off. She'd told me from the beginning that she was going to be a winner either way. She'd either beat the disease and be with us, or she would die and be with Jesus. But I wasn't a winner.  I was lost. And seeing her at peace finally only gave me a tiny bit of comfort. Because what good was her peace when I suddenly felt unwhole, ripped apart?

« Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 09:25:12 AM by boe »

The Hero of Rhyme
Level 83
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Project of the Year 20142014 Queen of RMRK2014 Best RPG Maker User - Story2011 Best Newbie2014 Best RPG Maker User - Creativity2014 Kindest Member2013 Queen of RMRKBronze SS AuthorBronze Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 ParticipantFor taking arms in the name of your breakfast.GOOD!For frequently finding and reporting spam and spam bots2012 Best RPG Maker User (Creativity)2012 Best Yuyubabe Smiley;o
I know I already told you all of this, but I'm going to post it here, too.

I teared up several times when reading this. The pain and sorrow of losing someone close to you is a heavy burden to bear - and I think you captured the moment in the best way possible, as it came from your heart.

I think the best part about this is that it's personal to you, and you're coming out with your feelings and laying them out and facing them. It's incredibly moving.

Lots of love, Jules <3

Spoiler for Maybe some helpful critique:
You know how we are about paragraphs. But this one is so short that I think it's not nearly as daunting. :) The sentences are just a bit cut-and-dry, but that could also fit the theme.

I'm still very moved by it. And slightly teary, ahh...
Spoiler for My Games and Art:

My Artwork Thread

The Lhuvia Tales [Current]

Ambassador [Complete]

The Postman [Complete]

The Wyvern [Complete]

Phoenix Wright: Haunted Turnabout [Complete]

Major Arcana [Cancelled]

Level 98
2010 Best Veteran2014 King of RMRK2014 Best Counsel2014 Best Writer2014 Favorite Staff Member2014 Most Mature Member2014 Best IRC Chatterbox2014 Best Use of Avatar and Signature Space2013 Favorite Staff MemberSecret Santa 2013 ParticipantFor the great victory in the Breakfast War.Secret Santa 2012 Participant2011 Best Writer2011 Best Counsel2010 Best IRC Chatterbox2010 Funniest Member
Such a sad tale to tell. There is beauty to be had in the directness of writing, and it is not for want here. Your own experience shines through and it is clear you are writing from your heart. Although it is short and isn't a 'story' in the traditional sense, you paint a picture of heartache and languish, a momentary capture from your soul.

Very well done, would read again.  :roph2:
you awoke in a burning paperhouse
from the infinite fields of dreamless sleep

RMRK's dad
Level 86
You know, I think its all gonna be okay.
For going the distance for a balanced breakfast.Project of the Month winner for June 2009For being a noted contributor to the RMRK Wiki2013 Best WriterSilver Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 Participant
That hit the target.

That's all I'm gonna say. :cry:

Level 41
Bronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer
Absolutely heartbreaking, but brilliant. I have nothing bad to say about it at all; the writing is just perfect.

*sniff*...  :'(

RMRK's dad
Level 86
You know, I think its all gonna be okay.
For going the distance for a balanced breakfast.Project of the Month winner for June 2009For being a noted contributor to the RMRK Wiki2013 Best WriterSilver Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 Participant
This is just another example of the artist knowing when another stroke would be too much. There is only the art, lean and accessible. Nothing to carve away, just the bullet that you see coming yet cannot avoid. It reaches inside to the emotion dial and spins it all the way to bleak with no effort.

C'est magnifique.

« Last Edit: March 27, 2014, 06:55:54 AM by EvilM00s »

Level 44
Bronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer
10/10 from me.
Not only was it beautiful, it was real, and I've been there.

I really have nothing more I can say. :3