If zombies roamed the Earth

Post here on what you would do if zombies roamed the earth



I would Hide in a Army base

Zombies would be even more played out than they already are.

i wud eat teh zombies, ftw!!!

But seriously, while I enjoy zombie games/films, they are over used.

*dust off copy of zombie survival guide*
*cocks shotgun*
*waits*

*Hides in holed*
*Grabs a flame thrower*
*put head between knees and prays*

and once again, they are used to much

Die or become a zombie, probably. I'm not very resourceful. And I'm being honest with myself.

Depends on what sort of zombies.  Judging from all realism, let's assume that we're talking super-rabies shambling zombies.  These seem the most likely to happen.

First, depending on the time of the year, there are different environmental aspects we have to take into account.  If it's cold, the zombies will likely freeze relatively quickly due to their lack of ingenuity, if it's hot, they will dehydrate quickly and their muscles will lock up.

Secondly, are they really 'dead'?  If they are, we can count on rigormortis to affect their mobility as well as muscle deterioration.  If they are not, we know that they must have a pulse and blood flow, therefore we can assume that you can bleed out a non-dead zombie.  You may also be able to poison, drown, suffocate, or use disease to combat them.

Given those two facts, and that the zombies are normal people who have likely lost most of their mobility due to the zombification process, we can easily counter this invasion with a few simple methods.

1) The Zombie Antithesis is a Shotgun, or a nice Baseball Bat.  Both are easy to use and provide massive physical trauma for the end result.  You've likely swung a baseball bat in your life at least once, and so it should be a natural weapon.  If you're up against a few scattered shamblers, it's time to play homerun derby.  Except with their heads.

2) Against a big group?  Run, Run, and last but not least, RUN.  They are much slower than you and if you do not allow yourself to be cornered, then you will make it away just fine.  Cardio is your friend, as is knowing the layout of the streets you are living on.

3) If you see someone bitten and it has been determined that zombieism is contagious, fuck the moral issues and put them out of their misery.  Would you rather die human or be a mindless cannibal?  I know what I would choose.

4) Don't form large groups.  This one is a no-brainer.  Too many people means too much conflicting interest, and too many safety oversights.  It's much easier to manage a smaller group than a larger group.

5) Learn how to barricade and where the nearest hardware store is.  If you can fortify an apartment complex, you can support yourself and your group.

6) Learn to like preserved food.  It's what you'll be eating for a while.

Taking all of this into consideration, you really only have to wait the zombies out.  Eventually they will be killed by the elements, starvation, and decomposition (if they are dead.)  I estimate that given the average human has to drink water every day or die, if they are 'living' zombies, it will be maybe a few weeks before the infection dies out (mostly).  At that point, bodies should be burned.  If they are dead zombies, it may take longer, but they will eventually shrivel up and decompose to the point where they can no longer move.  At that point, bodies should be burned.

In either case, it's a simple strategy.  Suit up, barricade in, and turtle.

I'd probably hand tight in my apartment, moving up to the 20th floor and taking a corner apartment.

The corner apartment lowers the chance of getting ambushed should I need to venture out of my unit. Also, they're larger, and nicer. I can scavenge for food in neighboring units, taking with me whatever melee weapon works.  I have one of those tall lamps that is in three segments.  It would probably break down pretty well in to three usable melee weapons. The doors on our apartment units are incredibly thick and strong, so I think they're be strong enough to withstand zombie-knocking.

Also, the higher up apartment gives me a good view of the city, so I know what's going on outside, if it matters.

Other than that, uh, survive, I guess? Like Namk said, suit up, barricade, turtle.

Oh, and don't trust any other people.

The rule to surviving the Zombeh Apocalypse is to keep the following things in mind:

1. You are not a weapons expert
2. Confrontation is your enemy
3. Just because they are human does not mean they will help you.
4. Find WATER. You can live without food longer than you can without water.
5. Something seems too good to be true? It is.
6. Stay away from: Supermarkets, Churches, Police/Fire Stations, Hospitals, large Hardware stores. they are all going to be flooded with people looking for food, weapons, help or salvation.
7. Good places to be are: old prisons, castles, anywhere that is isolated and elevated.
8. Always have an exit plan. Have at least three DIFFERENT ways to get out of your hideout.
9. Don't use guns. Full stop. Learn to wield at least a baseball bat or large kitchen knife.
10. If you can run, then RUN. What would you rather have, your pride or your life?
11. Don't go somewhere if you don't know it. If you stick to the town you were born and raised in, you're always going to know where to run in a life-or-death situation.
12. Keep your mind busy. Learn to paint, read classic puzzles, do sudoku. Anything to stop you going mad.


And, this one is the kicker, the one you MUST remember.
13. They aren't your family anymore.

I would post more but that would make me look paranoid.

Still... A shotgun sounds good to me, But otherwise I agree.

Rule 1:Cardio)The fat people are usually the first to go
Rule 2:Bathrooms)Not just bathrooms but avoid any small places with one exit
Rule 3:Seatbelts)It's all very well if you can find a car to escape with,but wot u gonna do when you to flying through the windscreen into a horde of zombies?
Rule 4:Double tap)Always make sure that the zombie you shot actually is killed (Well...Re-killed)
Rule 5:No attachments)Having attachments can get you killed,for instance having a family who you go back to rescue
Rule 6:Travel in a group)If you're on your own the zombies will go for you,but if you travel with a blind old man and kid with a broken leg for instance,you have a better survival chance

Rule 7:keep the dumb dumbs close at hand)You always wanna keep the stupid people close,don't ask why,just trust
Rule 8:Kill with efficiency)It's not about pretty kills it's  about finding the best way to destroy the brain you can use anything from a toilet lid to a baseball bat
Rule 9:Guns are for hunting,not zombie killing)If you use guns on zombies,you're gonna run outta ammo,only use guns for hunting or tight situations
Rule 10:Be quiet)You don't need to kill every single zombie,it's better to sneak around than become zombie food

I couldn't find every single rule so let's skip to rule 15

Rule 15:No your way out)Nuffin worse than a unplanned escape
Rule 17:Don't be a hero)Pretty much explains it's self
Rule 18:Limber up)It's a good idea to strecth alittle so you don't pull a muscle when running from or fighting zombies
Rule  19:Blend in)Sometimes your only way to survive,Just make sure you get the right movements and smell
Rule 20:Find the right shelter)A people carrier or camper van with be a good choice
Rule 21:Zombies can't climb)If you need to stop,get up a high building or something,jsut make sure you have a way down
Rule 22:Be ruthless)In a zombie apocalypse always remember,they ent ur family or frends no more
Rule 23:God bless rednecks)When it comes to zombies,rednecks are the people to have with you
Rule 24:No drinking)How are you gonna escape zombies when ur drunk?
Rule 31:Check the backseat)Always do this before u drive off
Rule 32:Enjoy the little things)It's a zombie apocalypse,smash a car,rob a house and enjoy it,no-ones gonna stop you

Rule 33: Learn to put a space after punctuation.

Fire is your best friend. And cricket bats. Have a cauliflower garden to confuse the brain eating subhumans.

I kill hella zombies.

Rule 1:Cardio)The fat people are usually the first to go
Rule 2:Bathrooms)Not just bathrooms but avoid any small places with one exit
Rule 3:Seatbelts)It's all very well if you can find a car to escape with,but wot u gonna do when you to flying through the windscreen into a horde of zombies?
Rule 4:Double tap)Always make sure that the zombie you shot actually is killed (Well...Re-killed)
Rule 5:No attachments)Having attachments can get you killed,for instance having a family who you go back to rescue
Rule 6:Travel in a group)If you're on your own the zombies will go for you,but if you travel with a blind old man and kid with a broken leg for instance,you have a better survival chance

Rule 7:keep the dumb dumbs close at hand)You always wanna keep the stupid people close,don't ask why,just trust
Rule 8:Kill with efficiency)It's not about pretty kills it's  about finding the best way to destroy the brain you can use anything from a toilet lid to a baseball bat
Rule 9:Guns are for hunting,not zombie killing)If you use guns on zombies,you're gonna run outta ammo,only use guns for hunting or tight situations
Rule 10:Be quiet)You don't need to kill every single zombie,it's better to sneak around than become zombie food

I couldn't find every single rule so let's skip to rule 15

Rule 15:No your way out)Nuffin worse than a unplanned escape
Rule 17:Don't be a hero)Pretty much explains it's self
Rule 18:Limber up)It's a good idea to strecth alittle so you don't pull a muscle when running from or fighting zombies
Rule  19:Blend in)Sometimes your only way to survive,Just make sure you get the right movements and smell
Rule 20:Find the right shelter)A people carrier or camper van with be a good choice
Rule 21:Zombies can't climb)If you need to stop,get up a high building or something,jsut make sure you have a way down
Rule 22:Be ruthless)In a zombie apocalypse always remember,they ent ur family or frends no more
Rule 23:God bless rednecks)When it comes to zombies,rednecks are the people to have with you
Rule 24:No drinking)How are you gonna escape zombies when ur drunk?
Rule 31:Check the backseat)Always do this before u drive off
Rule 32:Enjoy the little things)It's a zombie apocalypse,smash a car,rob a house and enjoy it,no-ones gonna stop you

rule 34: there is always porn of it
rule 35: stop ripping off zombieland

IF Zombies took over, the answer to that problem is in "I Am Legend"

Rule 1:Cardio)The fat people are usually the first to go
Rule 2:Bathrooms)Not just bathrooms but avoid any small places with one exit
Rule 3:Seatbelts)It's all very well if you can find a car to escape with,but wot u gonna do when you to flying through the windscreen into a horde of zombies?
Rule 4:Double tap)Always make sure that the zombie you shot actually is killed (Well...Re-killed)
Rule 5:No attachments)Having attachments can get you killed,for instance having a family who you go back to rescue
Rule 6:Travel in a group)If you're on your own the zombies will go for you,but if you travel with a blind old man and kid with a broken leg for instance,you have a better survival chance

Rule 7:keep the dumb dumbs close at hand)You always wanna keep the stupid people close,don't ask why,just trust
Rule 8:Kill with efficiency)It's not about pretty kills it's  about finding the best way to destroy the brain you can use anything from a toilet lid to a baseball bat
Rule 9:Guns are for hunting,not zombie killing)If you use guns on zombies,you're gonna run outta ammo,only use guns for hunting or tight situations
Rule 10:Be quiet)You don't need to kill every single zombie,it's better to sneak around than become zombie food

I couldn't find every single rule so let's skip to rule 15

Rule 15:No your way out)Nuffin worse than a unplanned escape
Rule 17:Don't be a hero)Pretty much explains it's self
Rule 18:Limber up)It's a good idea to strecth alittle so you don't pull a muscle when running from or fighting zombies
Rule  19:Blend in)Sometimes your only way to survive,Just make sure you get the right movements and smell
Rule 20:Find the right shelter)A people carrier or camper van with be a good choice
Rule 21:Zombies can't climb)If you need to stop,get up a high building or something,jsut make sure you have a way down
Rule 22:Be ruthless)In a zombie apocalypse always remember,they ent ur family or frends no more
Rule 23:God bless rednecks)When it comes to zombies,rednecks are the people to have with you
Rule 24:No drinking)How are you gonna escape zombies when ur drunk?
Rule 31:Check the backseat)Always do this before u drive off
Rule 32:Enjoy the little things)It's a zombie apocalypse,smash a car,rob a house and enjoy it,no-ones gonna stop you

rule 34: there is always porn of it
rule 35: stop ripping off zombieland

COuldn't resist

call on the Brown Pacific Islander Goddess of Love also known as Francine Dee(Queen of the Import Scene) to take me to her Palace

Survive, by all means necessary.
Get my hands on a few maps.
Gain an interest in the sewers (best way to travel).
Get some lightweight weapons.
Stay quite.
Not play loud music.
Instead of hunting for food in a tainted area, eat sealed foods and drink sealed water.
Not help the little girl who hasn't seen me yet.

In america at least out gun nuts will mop up the zombies.
Not to mention the fact that if it happens in the middle of summer. They are gonna decompose. Fast.
And the dead of winter. They are going to Freeze. Fast.

pfft. you think summer's are hot in america? come on down under, australia's located approximately three-QUARTERS(not fourths) of a KILOMETER from the surface of the sun. and there are spiders. everywhere. maybe they could kill the zombies?

Okay so if zombies roamed the earth it would depend on what type for what situation. What I mean by this is that say there Resident Evil zombies. If they were we could just get a car (In my situation i would find a cop car and grab a shotgun) and drive away. Then fill up at gas stations and get food and water. If it would be 28 weeks later or Left 4 Dead zombies, we are dead. The reason why i say this is because most people just don't know how to use a gun, and it only takes one mistake and your infected... So if the zombies walk, run. If the zombies run, GET A GUN (or a bat). Happy Shooting

I would summon the spirit of some shotgun weilding nut and let it do all the work while I rest on my pool chair.

Okay, where to begin? This is what I would do...

1. Arm myself. Grab anything that is durable and can be used as a weapon in my house or near my location. Examples would be my sword, frying pans, wood-cutting axes or hatchets, the machete in my basement, kitchen knives, even a lamp if it so pleases you.

2. Get a car. Preferably a big car. A truck. Or a van. It doesn't matter that I don't have a license, who's gonna stop me? However, if there is someone near me who is NOT a zombie or infected, and they have a license, they get to drive.

3. Hit the next corner store. Grab food and bottled water. Not alcohol, not when driving and fighting zombies. Any sealed food and bottled water, load into the back seat of said van/truck. Grab cash as well. It could be useful in another place.

4. Get to the nearest Weather Station. They have a chopper. Fuel up and get out. Go anywhere that is not destroyed.

Bring a maximum of three people with you, minimum of two. Don't want to get caught in a sticky situation by yourself. Gotta have someone watching your back. Also, no secrets between the two or three of you from that point on. If someone has received or think they have received the infection, they die. If necessary, they kill themselves. Other, safe lives are more important than the life of a zombie.

Ah yes, and the number one golden rule about surviving a zombie apocalypse:


Run.

                           
                  
                     

It's alive!