RMRK is retiring.
Registration is disabled. The site will remain online, but eventually become a read-only archive. More information.

RMRK.net has nothing to do with Blockchains, Cryptocurrency or NFTs. We have been around since the early 2000s, but there is a new group using the RMRK name that deals with those things. We have nothing to do with them.
NFTs are a scam, and if somebody is trying to persuade you to buy or invest in crypto/blockchain/NFT content, please turn them down and save your money. See this video for more information.
[Writing] Tripping the Darkness

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

*
RMRK's dad
Rep:
Level 86
You know, I think its all gonna be okay.
For going the distance for a balanced breakfast.Project of the Month winner for June 2009For being a noted contributor to the RMRK Wiki2013 Best WriterSilver Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 Participant
Auteur: Francois Pepin, aka EvilM00s

Theme: Deafth!

Word Count: Microsoft Office says 611.


Tripping the Darkness


Jerome was somewhat confused. Baffled, actually. A moment before now, he had been engaging in his typical tuber-like activities on his sofa with a belly full of beer and Hungry Dude™ microwavable fried chicken, and now he stood in a meadow of washed out neutral coloured grass and bare trees.

No sooner had this realisation registered than he was struck by the inevitable consequences of what he would later identify as the most painfully poignant disorientation he had ever known. Whatever was going on, the laws of physics were angry at its occurrence and were treating his brain like a 45 rpm vinyl record. Simultaneously, his eyes had forgotten how to process visual input and that encouraged his stomach to vault sideways- which in turn threatened to forcefully return his dinner into society without his consent.

However, a moment more and Jerome recovered his balance, bearings and brain. His vision was still a bit blurry, but only selectively, it seemed; the dirty beige grass before him appeared with perfect clarity, as did the line of the horizon of this queer landscape. But the gnarled, leafless trees that were scattered sparsely across the dismal demesne were out of focus no matter how Jerome attempted to adjust his usually 20/20 vision.

Less immediate but just as disturbing was the pain in his chest and his apparent lack of desire to breathe. Jerome couldn’t put his finger on it, but something was off, almost mechanical about his respiration, and he was unable to alter the cadence his lungs were following.

The bleak grey sky carried a breeze that chilled the skin despite the otherwise prevailing warm weather. The shin-height field cover waved in the wind that gave Jerome goose bumps from its temperature… or perhaps it was the sudden realisation that he was not alone.

A black blob crested the horizon, as out of focus as the trees but definitely moving, and it was coming toward Jerome. He looked away to assess the surroundings for an escape. To his horror, he found no egress from the plains as far as his eyes could see, and more alarmingly, the figure was in front of him again. Jerome hurriedly looked in all directions, each time seeing the hooded shadow approach from whichever direction he was looking at the time. More alarming still, it was getting closer with every second.

Jerome tried to run, but he found his feet unwilling to obey. It was as if he was mired in mud; his legs were not heavy but simply unable to carry out his orders. Panic set in as his unwelcome companion, still out of focus, drew close enough to reach out and grasp Jerome’s wrist. His arm surrendered to numbness as skeletal fingers pulled him toward an unknown doom.

A searing pain tore through Jerome’s chest, and the figure paused. Jerome heard a rhythmic beep over the now cacophonous wind which blew back the figure’s hood to reveal a skull countenance. The expression was one of anger and Jerome felt his consciousness being squeezed through what felt like a pinhole trying to accommodate an ocean liner. The field before him shrank and twisted, and vanished altogether until darkness overtook him.

“Stop CPR!”
Frank put the paddles of the defibrillator down and put his first two fingers on his patients’ neck and felt the regular thumping of a heartbeat.

“Pulses are present. We got him, Mike.”

Mike replied dryly, “Suck it, Reaper.” The two medics bumped elbows and got to work stabilising their patient.

Back in the dreary fields, Death looked toward the sky and yelled, "Interference!"
« Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 09:21:12 AM by boe »
:tinysmile:

*******
RMRK's Mom
Rep:
Level 88
I intend to live forever - so far so good.
2014 Most Missed Member2013 Most Mature Member2013 Best Counsel2013 Kindest Member2013 Queen of RMRKBronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer2012 Best Counsel2012 Kindest Memberluv u bb <3Secret Santa 2012 ParticipantFor taking a crack at the RMRK Wiki2010 Kindest Member
I have been anxiously waiting for you to post something because I knew it would be amazing. And you didn't disappoint.  This is why we have the :M00sApproved:   
Because your skill is at such a level that we all aspire to it.  I'm in awe sir.


That last line.. man, if you could see the smile on my face! 

*
RMRK's dad
Rep:
Level 86
You know, I think its all gonna be okay.
For going the distance for a balanced breakfast.Project of the Month winner for June 2009For being a noted contributor to the RMRK Wiki2013 Best WriterSilver Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 Participant
Awesome! I'm so happy it was entertaining; it sure was fun to write! Thanks, J!
:tinysmile:

****
Rep:
Level 44
Storyteller
Bronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer
/claps claps claps

I loved it! ^^
I can't say anything negative about it!
Well done, sir. :3

***
Rep:
Level 41
Bronze SS AuthorBronze Writing Reviewer
Now THIS is some impressive stuff here.

The imagery throughout, most notably the black blob and the titular reaper himself, was quite striking and fitting for a story of its thematic element. Mike's last line, of course, is all kinds of awesome and cathartic considering he was basically facing his demise. Seriously, the man's literally staring clinical death in the face and he gets out alive.

Hats off to you, Mr. M00s.

*
The Hero of Rhyme
Rep:
Level 83
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
2014 Queen of RMRK2014 Best RPG Maker User - StoryProject of the Year 20142011 Best Newbie2014 Kindest Member2014 Best RPG Maker User - Creativity2013 Queen of RMRKBronze SS AuthorBronze Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 ParticipantFor taking arms in the name of your breakfast.GOOD!For frequently finding and reporting spam and spam bots2012 Best RPG Maker User (Creativity)2012 Best Yuyubabe Smiley;o
Placeholder. I'll read this soon, I promise. ;9

Eagerly looking forward to it! ;)
Spoiler for My Games and Art:
ℒℴѵℯ❤


My Artwork Thread

The Lhuvia Tales [Current]

Ambassador [Complete]

The Postman [Complete]

The Wyvern [Complete]

Phoenix Wright: Haunted Turnabout [Complete]

Major Arcana [Cancelled]


*
The Hero of Rhyme
Rep:
Level 83
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
2014 Queen of RMRK2014 Best RPG Maker User - StoryProject of the Year 20142011 Best Newbie2014 Kindest Member2014 Best RPG Maker User - Creativity2013 Queen of RMRKBronze SS AuthorBronze Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 ParticipantFor taking arms in the name of your breakfast.GOOD!For frequently finding and reporting spam and spam bots2012 Best RPG Maker User (Creativity)2012 Best Yuyubabe Smiley;o
Okay, now I've read this. And I gotta say: I love, love, loved it! O.O

Not only was the story really interesting and detailed, but the ending was fantastic. I honestly didn't expect something like that to happen! It took an amazing turn from something eerie and dark into something practical and light-hearted. Fantastic!

The descriptions were amazing - especially the use of metaphors and similes. This story has quite a bit of charm to it, my friend!
Spoiler for My Games and Art:
ℒℴѵℯ❤


My Artwork Thread

The Lhuvia Tales [Current]

Ambassador [Complete]

The Postman [Complete]

The Wyvern [Complete]

Phoenix Wright: Haunted Turnabout [Complete]

Major Arcana [Cancelled]


*
RMRK's dad
Rep:
Level 86
You know, I think its all gonna be okay.
For going the distance for a balanced breakfast.Project of the Month winner for June 2009For being a noted contributor to the RMRK Wiki2013 Best WriterSilver Writing ReviewerSecret Santa 2013 Participant
Why, thank you! I had a ton of fun writing this one. Death is one of my favourite characters and I have personally fought him on several occasions. He and I have a friendly rivalry, and I think he lets me win sometimes... because eventually, the game will be his.
:tinysmile: