This tutorial is great for new people:
http://rmrk.net/index.php/topic,762.0.htmlto answer your specific questions:
In the system tab of the database (accessed by F9 or by clicking the icon), you can set starting party in the top right corner.
Attacks are based on the weapons they have equipped. You can set an animation on any weapon (in the weapons tab of the database) and all you need to do is equip the weapon.
A lot of your questions can be answered through the tutorial I linked to. The help file is also a good source, and you can always right click on stuff and click "What's this?" and get a short description of the thing.