[Visual] K-T's Writing File

(oops,plz move this to creativity outlet)
Hello Crankeye Members,
I'm Kune-Tear, and i have a favor for writing.I mainly like writing fiction,but a chance at Sci-Fi,would be an option.I'm gonna post some of my examples of writing here, and every week have omething new up, whether it's a request, or a freewrite i did.I will take requests on plots,backgrounds,descriptions, etc. Now here's some examples

The Taldarc Stories      I: Assassin on the Move

Taldarc
Age: 15
Appearance: 61 inches, weighing only about 116,while he stands tall he wears his nice, smooth, long Brownish/Black hair. He wears a nice vest with a decent undershirt, the vest being leather and black, and the undershirt white. The vest has pattern to look like dragon scales but they are not all the same some taking up more room then the others. His pants, which are of cloth, are tattered a little and are frayed at the bottom. His eyes gleam an aquamarine color.

Chapter 1

2 years before
*Chirp, Chirp**Chirp Chirp*"Ah the nice sound of crickets" Taldarc remarks. "Mother breakfast done?

This belongs in Creativity outlet.

I know, i realized i accidentally posted it here, at the top it asks to plz move it

Has anyone read these?Just wondering

Jep i readed it and to tell the truth, the story is confusing for me.
There is too many info about the things you know.

but its a good story for an rpg of some sort.

keep em coming

ok thanks,i will take any criticism,because it helps you as long as its really constructive.Was it the Taldarc one that was confusing?I can make a more understandable version of it if anybody would like.