Ask an Aussie

Go ahead mate, throw me a question.

Who are you, and why does your name sound familiar?

Are you fat?

Were you carried off into the wilds by dingos as a child and raised by Koalas?

Ever been to Perth?
My mother-in-law moved there recently.
Seems like a nice place.

What part of AUS are you in?

If I had a chance to, I'd want to live on the West Coast....
You ever seen the Great Coral Reef?
Is it true you can't even snorkle there b/c of the jellyfishes?

How many more questions like this can you take?

Is it true that nothing is impossible except raining in the Northern Territory?

Realising the shunning I'll get for necroposting (please go easy, mates), I've discovered that I've lived in Australia my entire life. Unless anyone cares, I'll be taking over this thread .

Starting from the top and skipping Zylos' question, we're not all fat. In fact, a very small percentage of us are. And I'm not.
I was dragged off by dingos once. However, wombats raised me, not koalas.
I've never been to Perth, I've been everywhere except WA. I do wish to go there someday. Some of you may not know how huge Australia is and how little people live there. It's only very slightly smaller than the USA, and we have almost 15 times less people.
And that isn't true at all. In July last year, (it's cold in July over here btw) Alice Springs, the most arid city in the country, was flooded. Imo, Australia is the most bizarre place on the planet when it comes to whether. Especially here in Melbourne.

How does it feel being inferior to Kiwis?

I wouldn't know, ask someone who lives in Adelaide. I've been to Kiwiland, and the landscapes are absolutely stunning. But they fuck sheep, so we're better.

What would you say if I said I was an asian aussie?

Unlike most aussies, I wouldn't tell you to get out of my country. I believe that if you came from a worse place, which if you live in Beijing or Tokyo you are squashed against millions of people trying to get around, you should be welcome to Australia or any other country. The asylum seekers, however, are not my business and the government has rules that they must follow.
For god's sake, our prime minister is a single, red-headed woman from QUEENSLAND!