Here's what I think you should do, and remember, this is just my opinion.
First, you should get all pissed off about something stupid. Then, make a topic about how you've been offended, and you hate everyone, and you're leaving. Then, when people reply to that topic as if nobody knew who you were in the first place, let it be revealed that you never left at all, but were secretly monitoring your whiny thread for activity. After that, try to play it cool, and hope that people will somehow want you back. You can even ask people what they want you to do.
That's just me though.