[Visual] Jappy's very first CGed artwork

[JAP]

Okay, I made this last September and think that I should show it to RMRKers. Because I love you ppl! xDDDD
It's the cover of my shoujo-ai webcomic, i n n o c e n c e.

I just get used to color things with Photoshop... But I need to improve!! BTW I lineart and sketch manually. Only the coloring's done in comp.
I want a tablet badly now
Comments, critiques!! HAIL!!

[Nightwolf]

It's pretty cool, like the words on the white shirted girl's shirt, they fit in pretty good. I realised the purple things are a mountain type of things, but whats purple things near the white-shirty? All those purple things with yellow tops?

[JAP]

Oh, I used purple flower patterns for that. It seemed to turn out ugly. xD

Thanks though. =D

[Leventhan]

The skirt looks blurry.

But awesome job!

[JAP]

Thanks, Leven-san!! =D

[biohazard]

Is it just me, or near her hip does it say love is desu? if so, lulz.

[Nightwolf]

It does...

NOW I REALISED THOSE ARE FLOWERS IN A BOX. Zoooooom halpz.

[JAP]

Yesh, love is desu. XDDDDD

But, not, actually it said love is desire, but the cloth line's bumped on it, so yeah. xDDD

[Sophist]

desu desu desu desu.


I like the picture. :3










(is it because I am a girl?)

[JAP]

Nah, my friend is a girl but she hate it. =O Well can't blame her she's a doofus after all. She always said eveyone's drawing is worse than hers.

EDIT:
Here's second work. It's the design of the new RPG I'm going to make.

EDIT2: Removed it. Sorry. Just don't fit my wants. Thanks.

[Leventhan]

lol Love is Desu.
Hm.. her colours looks to similar.

[JAP]

Yeah, but I work more on the shading...

Not much difference? O.o

[Lord Dante]

I can't see the second one.

[JAP]

Opps sorry I just deleted it because I just changed the design of the character, slightly. I hate coloring with mouse. T_T Well, like what Leventhan said, it's not much different from the first one.
Whaddya think about the first one, Lord Dante? =D

[Lord Dante]

Well, and this isn't supposed to be harsh, mind you-

Girl on left- Personally, this generic anime style is a little too...how to put it... abundant. That isn't to say this drawing is bad, but I personally would love to see you develop a more individualized way of portraying your characters. Actually, that point applies to the entire work.
However, to me it looks as though her neck is too skinny to be that long, but she's a pretty skinny girl anyways, so that's more of a personal preference than a legitimate critique.

The only technical problem i can spot is that the second (rightmost) girl's legs are waaay too short. The upper part of her legs, which are horizontal, should extend out more, thusly decreasing the inward angle of the leg bend to have the foot end up in the same position as it is now.
The hands are probably one of the most amazing aspects of this, and that is, believe it or not, saying alot, as hands are one of the most difficult things to draw in any style (except maybe chibi )

I'll also suggest that you use the floral pattern you obtained as a reference for your own patterning, as it'll undoubtedly fit the pleats on the skirt better if you draw it yourself.

[JAP]

Well, and this isn't supposed to be harsh, mind you-

Girl on left- Personally, this generic anime style is a little too...how to put it... abundant. That isn't to say this drawing is bad, but I personally would love to see you develop a more individualized way of portraying your characters. Actually, that point applies to the entire work.
However, to me it looks as though her neck is too skinny to be that long, but she's a pretty skinny girl anyways, so that's more of a personal preference than a legitimate critique.

The only technical problem i can spot is that the second (rightmost) girl's legs are waaay too short. The upper part of her legs, which are horizontal, should extend out more, thusly decreasing the inward angle of the leg bend to have the foot end up in the same position as it is now.
The hands are probably one of the most amazing aspects of this, and that is, believe it or not, saying alot, as hands are one of the most difficult things to draw in any style (except maybe chibi )

I'll also suggest that you use the floral pattern you obtained as a reference for your own patterning, as it'll undoubtedly fit the pleats on the skirt better if you draw it yourself.

Lord Dante-sama!!!! I LOVEEEE YOUUUUU!!!
No, this is not a joke, this is very serious. I really really thank you for the amazing and detailed critique.
=)
About the hands, well, personally, I'm proud of my drawing of hands!! =D I really love to draw hands, and yes, feet are my problems. =)
Thank you very much!! I'll do my best to improve each day~! <3

[Lord Dante]

Well, and this isn't supposed to be harsh, mind you-

Girl on left- Personally, this generic anime style is a little too...how to put it... abundant. That isn't to say this drawing is bad, but I personally would love to see you develop a more individualized way of portraying your characters. Actually, that point applies to the entire work.
However, to me it looks as though her neck is too skinny to be that long, but she's a pretty skinny girl anyways, so that's more of a personal preference than a legitimate critique.

The only technical problem i can spot is that the second (rightmost) girl's legs are waaay too short. The upper part of her legs, which are horizontal, should extend out more, thusly decreasing the inward angle of the leg bend to have the foot end up in the same position as it is now.
The hands are probably one of the most amazing aspects of this, and that is, believe it or not, saying alot, as hands are one of the most difficult things to draw in any style (except maybe chibi )

I'll also suggest that you use the floral pattern you obtained as a reference for your own patterning, as it'll undoubtedly fit the pleats on the skirt better if you draw it yourself.

Lord Dante-sama!!!! I LOVEEEE YOUUUUU!!!
No, this is not a joke, this is very serious. I really really thank you for the amazing and detailed critique.
=)
About the hands, well, personally, I'm proud of my drawing of hands!! =D I really love to draw hands, and yes, feet are my problems. =)
Thank you very much!! I'll do my best to improve each day~! <3

Heh.
I get a "sama" title. Woot.

Yeah, well, any time. I used to give it to Lavata but I haven't seen him or his work around lately, so...*shrug*
Can't wait to see your improved work though ^^

[Leventhan]

Looking forward to your next work!