Difficult essay... Help me!

Agh, so I have to write this essay for English 101.  That doesn't bother me in the least bit.  I know I'm an at least decent essay writer.  Usually I can whip up a passable essay in a couple hours.

But NOT THIS TIME.  I've been spending the last three days racking my brain, trying to come up with a subject to write about.

Right now, in the class, we are studying "processes."  A major project due at a later date will be to present a process to the class... Mine is on "How to Make Toast."  It's really cute.  I have a power point presentation all set up for it and everything.

But THIS essay is seperate from that project, although it still concerns processes.  The assignment is to analyze an existing process that has a flaw in it.  Then I have to describe how it can be fixed and provide a possible solution.  I have never in my life had absolutely no idea what to write about.  Describing a process, such as How to make Toast, is simple.  The difficult part is finding a process that is flawed.  Wtf do they expect me to do?

The examples the professor mentioned were applying for college and applying for a job.  Um, getting into college and finding a job was easy for me, so I don't have experience with any flaws in those systems.  I thought about writing about the electoral process... presidential elections and stuff.  It seems odd that the popular vote can be completely disregarded while the "real" part of the election takes place in the House.

Help me.  I have no idea what to write about.  What processes are there that need to be fixed?  And how in the holy heck am I supposed to come up with a solution?

Writing about flawed processes is rather simple for me, since I tend to rant about them daily. The problem here is presenting a solution. In most scenarios processes have naturally evolved, not to perfection, of course, but to what works out best, flawed or otherwise. I wish you luck on this essay. I always hated school.

Making toast is flawed, if the toaster bursts
Im the greatest essay writer in class, but im just not getting your topic clearly.
YOur using xtra complicated language for my innocent 13 year old brain to analyze.

:/

Making toast in a traditional way is flawed, and has been for generations. In your average toast-making session, you can be confident that the vast majority of people are going to be using a toaster. You'll always have those oldschoolers that will use conventional methods (such as a grill), but for the purpose of this, those select few are excluded.

    This flaw also relies on the fact that, given most circumstances, people are most likey to be doing more than one slice, either two (or more) for themselves, or kindly toasting a slice or two for a friend, loved one or relative.

    By design, nearly every toaster ever made can accomodate at least two slices of bread, and such a design is by far the most popular, albeit four and six slice toaster are coming into fashion. Bread is placed in the toaster and then the lever is pressed down. The toaster then heats the bread (or performs a lower-heated defrost cycle first if the bread happens to be frozen and your toaster supports that function). The toaster toasts the bread to your preference, as set by the dial or buttons found on all toasters, and when finished, will cease toasting and then pop up your bread, filling your kitchen with that "just toasted" smell.

    Though here lies a flaw. It is almost inevitable that all toast is going to be spread with butter (or margerine, or, god forbid, lard), all of which have a melting point lower than that of toast fresh from a toaster. Though as you're probably aware, toast is not a good insulator, and it's effectiveness at retaining heat could only be described as mediocre at best.
   
    Thus, while with your first slice you'll butter, the butter will melt thoroughly into the toast, giving it that ever so tantalizing taste, the second slice (and consequent slices) will only be a half-melted mess. The butter will not melt evenly and thorouhly as it did on the primary slice, and when you go to spread any extra thing onto the toast (jam, chocolate spread, marmalade and peanut butter are popular choices to name a few) it will mix with the "raw" peices of butter still there and create a taste experience that'll never be as nice as the first slice. (This is why, statistically, most people will keep the first slice for themselves, and prefer to share only subsequent slices with others.)

    The easiest and most effort free solution to this problem is to modify the toaster's in-built timing mechanism (and possibly the push-up mechanism, as most toasters will push up a whole row) so that toast is released sequentially, with enough time alotted in between each slice being ejected for the end-user to butter and spread each slice, giving each slice that "First Slice Taste™"

thats better than what i tought!

You could write how the "democratic" system is extremely corrupted these days and how elections are completely set up, but you could get expelled from your school, so I suggest you don´t.

I always hated school.

Wise words.

Heres a good one. Computer Heat sinks.

It may not actually be a flaw. You have to admit, the heat sink works wonderful. But let’s say, hypothetically, you want to change your processor. (It’s not the most common computer related task but it happens to the best of us.) Anyways it seems the heat sink is designed so well it’s impossible to take off. You can pry or pull the green lever to your hearts content and to no avail. I love it. I mean if they hadn't of designed it so well I might not have been able to change my processor in the first place. Unfortunately, I was in fact able to get the heat sink off. Though not the best security, it stood a good chance in a real life situation. Had robbers stolen my computer, I would at least know my processor had a good 24 hours to be recovered.  During the process the heat sink in question did, unfortunately, meet the demise of a rather large hammer and screwdriver. Though with a little super glue and T.L.C. the fan blade was reunited with the rest of the unit and buzzed happily thereof.

Haha, thank you all for your wonderful suggestions.  Maybe next time, I'll remember to post a help topic a day or two before the essay is due.

@Silver and Crank: both of yours really made me laugh.





If you were wondering, I ended up writing about how messed-up the writing process is.  ...and probably failed.


When I finish my PPT about toast, I'll be sure to post it.  It's really funny, and I drew all of the illustrations, so I want you guys to see it.   Mostly everyone else is doing serious topics, but one girl said she was going to do "Ho to open a door" so I was like, "Man, I want to do something funny, too."  Thus: Toast.  The epitome of funniness.