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[Writing] Eyes of the Wolf
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pokeball SophistOfflineFemale
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#1 • May 26, 2010
    • Uploadan for NAMKCOR
    « Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 09:41:28 AM by boe »
    you awoke in a burning paperhouse
    from the infinite fields of dreamless sleep
    pokeball MagitekEliteOfflineFemale
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    #2 • Aug 14, 2010
    • I don't know why no one has responded to this (well, maybe 'cause they have to download it lol) but I really liked. Unfortunately, I am really tired, so I had to mess with the font to help my eyes and a lot of the time, I had to re-read the sentence, if it wasn't the whole chapter.  Not 'cause it was confusing, but because my eyes kept getting all black (haven't had sleep in weeks...).

    Anyways, I really enjoyed it, and it was only 7 pages long, but pretty satisfying. I haven't read much lately, despite reading being one of my beloved passions (again, tired lol), but I loved the descriptive detail you included. I have one (or was it two?) pages left, but then I'm done.

    My only tiny, little complaint is the start of the story.

    Spoiler for:
    Quote
    The city continued as usual, but people stopped to wonder what was on the receiving end of the sirens. However, the receiving end was known now. The ambulance does not turn on their sirens when they have picked up a deceased personnel, they only leave the lights running.

    I thought maybe this part could be redone, somehow. It...I dunno, something seems a little off to me, but that could because I'm tired and comprehend the simplicity of it lol

    Well, besides the tiny complaint, I really liked it!  ;) Good job!

    *reppaties to you*
    Winter is Coming

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