Choose Your Own Adventure #1

You wake up in a dark alleyway, you are rather and you don't remember how you got there, or when you got there.



What do you do?

Kick the nearby garbage can over.

in a fit of raeg, you kick over the garbage can.
You don't feel any better.



the noise attracts a nearby police officer.



what do you do?

Get ye flask.

Tell the officer you've had too much to drink and make an excruciatingly unusual face at him

you cannot seem to locate 'ye flask'.



4 turns until arrest.

Tell the officer you've had too much to drink and make an excruciatingly unusual face at him

Tell the officer you've had too much to drink and make an excruciatingly unusual face at him

Tell the officer you've had too much to drink and make an excruciatingly unusual face at him

you tell the officer you've had too much to drink and make an excruciatingly unusual face at him.



the officer is not amused.
3 turns until arrest.

Kill the officer, rip off his face, and dawn his clothes. You now have a new identity, live your life as a police officer, raise his children, pleasure his wife.

Live happily until you die in your sleep at the age of 84.

you attempt to kill the police officer and rip his face off.
the police officer readies his pistol.



2 turns until arrest

Throw a smoke bomb at his face and run away

you throw a smoke bomb and escape like a ninja
the police officer is blinded



where do you go?

To the boardwalk to get a funnelcake.

you get to the boardwalk and locate the funnel caek vendor,
only to discover that you are totally broke



what do you do?

Push the guy off the boardwalk and steal a funnel cake

you push the man off the boardwalk
he screams very loudly



you devour the funnelcaek
+15 health



what do you do?

Commit suicide.

Commit suicide.

Cut across the stomach, and have a thought bubble of a catgirl peeing herself

you contemplate various methods of suicide



you decide that you will kill yourself the only honorable way.
your last thoughts are of catgirls peeing themselves



you die.

You wake up in a dark alleyway, you are rather and you don't remember how you got there, or when you got there.

hijack the two trashcans and form a hovercraft 

Pull a mcguiver and use those tools listed to go kill some hobo and take his pants, CAUSE YOU'RE NOT WEARING ANY

you attempt to assemble a hovercraft
only to find that you are lacking some key materials

• power source
• engine
• fan
• rotor
• steering mechanism
• duct tape

what do you do?

Make them into armor

Climb that ladder and jump off the roof to test the armor's durability.

you create trash can armor!
+25 Armor Bonus



You are asleep.
you have run out of action points for the day.

5 HOUR ENERGY FOUND IN THE TRASH - 1 hour left

Unable to act

You are asleep.
you have run out of action points for the day. 
 

IE, Namkcor has hand cramps.

I dream about waking up in a foreign land; fighting against epic armies and monsters of ebil!