Relic: Shadows of the Past(tentative title)

Relic
Shadows of the Past
Tentative Title
RPG Maker VX

Introduction:

Okay, this is my first project on VX, as well as my first presented project, so please don't be too harsh if it does indeed, well, suck. I have very little done, not even enough for a screenshot unless you want one of the database... I'm mainly posting this for feedback on story/character ideas to make it better. I'll probably post a new topic for the actual project/demo when I get that far. I'm planning on this being a two part game. I'll put everything in spoilers so that it won't become a huge post.

Spoiler for Story:

Legends tell of an ancient empire built before Engius even got its name, ruled by five immortals: Leais, the Elven Lady; Manyl, the Human Lord; Ulris, the Dwarven Tyrant; Sybek, the Vampiric Noble; and Meule, the Shadow. The legend goes ont o explain that these five immortals were sealed away behind a astral gate, banished to a second plain of existance, by a valiant knight and her nine companions. This legend was passed down, generation after generation, since anyone can remember, changing remarkably little as it is inherited.

However, that is still just a legend. Engius is a world made up of five countries, each one set up by a different race. Through Engius' 516 recorded years, the countries have vied for power amongst themselves, tearing eachother apart, piece by piece. That all ended, though, ten years ago when the Elven Nation of Ygan and the Human Kingdom of Jerile forged a treaty of peace, taking the first step in world unification. After time, the other three countries, the Dwarven Kingdom of Quillen, the Vampiric Nation of Kimbal, and the Nation of Half-Elves, Helfane, followed in their footsteps. With the world now at peace, life began to flourish...

In pursuit of knowledge, elven archaeologists began excavation at a ruined city left out from all other records. In a vault below a crippled tower, they uncovered a magically sealed ark. In an attempt to show good will, the Elven Lord Elwynn invited the leaders of the other four nations to his manor for the ark's opening, wanting to share whatever knowledge it may bring with his allies.

The leaders gathered in the elven city of Manyre, but the ark was never opened. Without anyone entering the vault, the ark had vanished. The countries began bickering amongst eachother once again, blaming one another for the theft, and, inevitably, a war started. Humans and Elves fought side by side, while the other three nations fought alone, engulfing the world into another terrifying war...
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That's the basic story story as it is told at the beginning of the game. Your basic 'OMFG! The ark is the key to the gate, man, and the evilly dude will open the gate and take the 5 peoplez powers and rule the world!' plot. Thankfully, I'm not that lame, and have planned a plot twist at the end of this part that should spice things up. There will be foreshadowing, but none too obvious as to shout it out.

Spoiler for Characters:

Lynn Relme   Age: 18(1256) Race:Elf      Class: Swordswoman
   A simple peasant, Lynn has always dreamed of a grand life of adventure, danger, and, as all women do, romance. But when the war begins stirring, and her quiet farming village is razed in a first-strike by the Vampires, her dream is realized, much to her dismay.

Aaron Kvatch   Age: 25   Race:Human      Class: Magician
   A simple street magician from Jerile, he was drafted by the Imperial Army for his 'talents'. After witnessing first-hand the horrors of war, he fled the military camp he was assigned to, becoming an outlaw for his own freedom.

Jane Zaile   Age: 19   Race:Human      Class: Archer
   Daughter of General Tylos Zaile of the Human Imperial Army. She always lived a life of luxury, trained in the art of war so that she can one day replace her father as general.

Harle Falcon   Age: 36   Race:Dwarf      Class: Warrior
   Owner of the Falcon Mining Company, Harle is one of the few dwarves who supports the unification of the countries.

Jackel Hyde   Age: 305   Race:Vampire   Class: Mage Knight
   A member of the Ikari, or mortal, tribe, Jackel's mother was bitten while she was pregnant with him, turning them both, but leaving him half-mortal and with a soul.

5 more to come...

Spoiler for Features:

• Storyline with two parts.
• 10 playable characters, each with unique back stories that intertwine with the main story.
• All main quests and side quests organized in a quest log for easy reference.
• Spell growth system eliminates the multiple spells of the same type, such as Fire, Fira, Firaga and causes once spell to evolve the more it is used.
• (Hopefully)More to come.

Okay, so that's the jist of it so far. Any comments on what's here, or suggestions on what to add/remove?

Good luck with the project.

Sounds like it has just about every RPG cliche to exist in it... Then again, you mentioned a plot twist, so idk. For a first storyline(i'm assuming that it is your first from your post), its pretty good. Good luck!