does this story line sound good?

[NinesVoerman]

vincent(the main character) has been away serving in the royal army of nerik he comes back and all hell has erupted in the 4 years he has gone. vincent finds that his family are dead and his life is ruined. an angel apears before him and tells him that he he is the the one that will end the suffering and pain.a sword lies before him a mystic sword called the hatarachi that the angel gives him.all of a sudden everything goes blank vincents mind cleared of everything...exept his family and the hatarachi he doesn't know about the war between the 7 worlds. vincent must regain his memory back while trying to end the war...

sounds pretty bad doesnt it

[Jangles]

Yes, yes it does  .

To nitpick a little, I suggest some changes, but these are things I would change if it were my game:

1. I would use a different name for the main character. Everytime I hear Vincinet I think of FF7 and I'm sure others do too. You don't have to but I would.

2. Why him? What is the reason that an angel chose this one soldier to be THE ONE. Is it because his home and family have been killed? Duing war, it is expected that civilians will be killed, so Vince would not be the only one who lost his family.

3. Why would an angel give him a sword and then blank his memory? Or is it the sword that does it? What is the reason for blanking it in the first place? While questing to regain his memory sounds interesting, you may need a differnt starting point than returning home. Maybe he lost his memory during the war and he wanders around helping people while his memory slowy returns. Then, he remebers his home and quikly returns only to find it in burned to the ground and the people dead.

4. Why a war of 7 worlds? If you really want to make this game, 7 worlds may be a bit much. 7 is up there with an epic of epics kind of game. Maybe scale it down to 2 or 3 or 4 worlds, that way it is less like teh seige of Troy and more like Odysseus' return voyage home. Creating 7 worlds sounds like a massiv undertaking and you don't want to get frustrated and quit.

You just need to flesh it out and realy think about the story. And don't get discouraged if your first idea turns out to be bad or changes so much there is nothing of the orginal left. That happens in all forms of storytelling from comics to boks to movies to games.

[viejator]

1. i dont have any problems with the name VINCENT but.. it's not for the main character of a RPG game..

2. The story is not bad.

3. You must have present that if the angel gives him the mystic sword, you wont be able to buy another swords..i mean.. why would you want a broad sword if you have the mystic sword?
but you could make some "gems" system to equip so the sword gets better

[NinesVoerman]

thanks guys ill change the name  and this was just a quick run through

as for the 7 worlds thing typo i meant 3 lol

i need scripters,artists and mappers and i suck at all 3 

[:)]

to request a team post a new topic here:

http://rmrk.net/index.php/board,59.0.html

[NinesVoerman]

to request a team post a new topic here:

http://rmrk.net/index.php/board,59.0.html

thanks dude you rock 

[:)]

no problem. 

[Rune]

I have some very basic scripting knowledge, and I can map

[ChaosSoldier92]

the story sound pretty good
but i dnt like vincent beacuse i juz dnt no