What do you think of my story idea?

I've been working on a game for months on and off. The story is different at least for a RPG Maker game. BUT I was wondering if the game would actually appeal to anyone?

SYNAPSE:
An evil demon from Hell seeks power to gain power. In Hell he is a mere demon. A minion of the emperor of Hell. As a demon he is already immortal, but to gain the power he wants, he must bargain with the emperor of Hell. The emperor of Hell is tired of ruling a dead realm with ghouls, zombies and demons. He wants to invade Earth and Hell has a portal directly to the planet, but Hell cannot invade with brainless zombies.

Seeking power and an escape from Hell, the demon makes a ploy to his master. If the demon is granted access to a human form, the demon will travel to Earth and steal the souls of mighty warriors for the army of dead that Hell is assembling. The souls will be stolen from the warriors and channeled into soulless empty bodies that await them in Hell. Once the demon has channeled enough souls where Hell has a compitant army, the invasion will begin!

The demon however serves many masters. Known only to the demon is a second master that he serves. The emperor of an alternate world. That second emperor also seeks to conquer Earth and integrate it into the worlds that he has already conquered. He has the mightiest army anyone will ever see, and has used it to conquer many other worlds. There is just one problem. While he has a grand army, there is no portal to Earth. The second emperor has promised that if the demon open a portal from Earth to the alternate world, the demon would become the ruler of Earth.

On Earth the demon is known as a human sorcerer. He makes powerful allies and powerful foes. Craving power, the demon allies with the Chinese emperor after gaining the favor of the emperor and after killing the general of the Chinese army. The people of Earth know that the demon in a human form is evil and incredibly powerful with magic a strength that is not humanly possible! The Chinese Emperor only knows that he will use the human sorcerer to obliterate his enemies! He is a more powerful ally and a foe that could easily decimate his army.

There are dream sequences where the demon is yanked back into Hell to speak with Hell's emperor. While in Hell, the ruler of the alternate world has a messanger there to aide the demon and give him more instructions. In his human form, the ghouls, and zombies treat him as a human. They seek to eat his flesh! Hell's emperor and other demons are the only ones that recognize him for the demon he truly is underneath of his human skin.

To make things more interesting, in Hell, the demons envy the demon for his human form and ability to walk on Earth's soil. Hell's emperor can easily replace the demon if he fails or dies as a human. While a demon is immortal, his human form can die and he will be sucked back to Hell! Meanwhile, if the demon betrays the second emperor, the servants / messangers will be waiting to snatch the demon and lock him in a box for all of eternity. Demons are immortal, but they will grow mad with nothing to do trapped in a box.

Keeping things interesting. There are demon slayers, angels, the gods of Earth want to know what the demon is up to and what Hell's emperor is plotting. There are several factions that want the human sorcerer dead for killing faction members.

The game spans generations, at the destruction of the Chinese Empire by rogue invaders. The empress smuggles away her only child to be raised by someone that knows the truth about the human sorcerer. That man trains the child into a great warrior that knows the demon in human form caused the fall of his father's empire.

TWIST:
The twist is that you play as the demon / human sorcerer. You are the evil, cold one. This is not a game where you save the world and do justice. This is where you bring about an invasion through your stealing souls and opening a portal to let in an awaiting army. It will also lead to your rise to the top of your own evil empire.

I likey

its always nice to play the villain for the change

My brain went numb from reading that. Really quite clichéd, and over the top. Try making it a little more simple at first, start with a basic, solid story that works rather then a lot of small stories that you plan on sewing together somehow.

I thank you for your opinion :-)

Well that's the synapse. The story starts that you know you are a demon that has bargained with Hell's leader. You are sent through a portal, and then the game truly starts, other elements are added with the game's progression. Since the plot is about you getting the souls of warriors to fill up an army of undead, you start out at a tournament.

That is really the basic of the game, a demon seeks power. Like the story of LOTR is about someone that is sent to throw a ring into a volcano. Everything else is really fluff to have more quests in the game. After all, as a demon seeking power, you would literally just seek power, not help people with random quests, saving babies, rescuing damsels or slaying dragons. The other characters bring the drama to you.

I currently have it scripted where the tournament has just ended. This next list is what is currently going on.

Here are the major parts:
- The Chinese emperor is just about to make an offer for the demon to lead the emperor's army.
- The guards of the Chinese emperor want the human sorcerer dead for killing their commander.
- One clan wants the human sorcerer dead, because the sorcerer has powerful fire abilities. The clan wants to learn those abilities to destroy their rivals. The sorcerer refuses, so the clan wants him dead. If they can't learn it no one can.

Here are the minor mentions:
- The emperor's wife is pregnant with a child that will rise up and try to defeat the demon.
- A god is trying to figure out what Hell's leader is up to and interrogates the demon.
- The god is currently making it storm at his displeasure.
- The grand marshal of the tournament knows the demon has done something to win. Cheated, used other worldly powers, something, he just does not know what and he is trying to find out.

Anymore feedback to this would be greatly appreciated.

Sounds interesting! =D

I would love to play as the villan for once!

All I have to say is that this demon had better be BA! love the ideas tho.

Hope you didnt read my topic and got the idea to be the villian @_@

lol, whatever

Anyways, this is a seriously nice thingy...story idea, hope you put it into action =D