I originally made this for LadyJ, and just saw that I hadn't posted it here.
So, yeah, I still think the piano part could do much better.
Comments?
:-*
YES YES YES A .tbt TO LISTEN TO!!! It's been so long. ;-; AND BY NW~ ahaha Listening now~
Hmmm... One thing I thought was that the second track should be a different instrument because it kinda blends with the first track and doesn't seem... asdfak; yea. XP
The first one reminded me of a Zelda/Chrono Trigger mix...but sweeter and more silent, which in my opinion, is very good.
I wish I could created music like that or even play music.
This is gonna be super-critical, so be warned.
Track 1: The progression's pretty simple, but it's okay. At least it sounds good. But it BEGS for a new progression later on. Try starting a new progression on A minor.
Actually, use this chord.
7
5
5
7
0
x
It's an A minor 9. It'll sound awesome after the last chord you use in the progression you already have. Like at bar 106. Figure out the next chord yourself, lol.
[spoiler]
Okay, I randomly came up with this one.
5
5
6
x
5
3
That's a weird chord, but it sounds oh-so-good after that Amin9. Give it a try if you like.
.....
Okay, after that one use this:
7
7
4
5
7
0
And spread them out one note at a time like you did with all the other chords.
lol
Anyway
[/spoiler]
Track 2: I really don't like this track. It's repeating the same note from track 1. Make it do something else. Or use different notes. Or a different instrument, like somebody else mentioned.
Track 3: See track two. Everything's moving downwards. Something really needs to move upwards. Not immediately. Save it for later, it'll make a nice effect.
Bells: Nice touch with the ringing, but then you, once again, just copy what you've already done in the other tracks.
Piano: Again, same thing, until you go into that piano solo thing. Which is pretty cool, good job with that. One or two sour notes, but oh well.
Melody on track 4: Re-work it. Make it like a real wind instrument line. That line would weird to play all in one breath. Add some pauses (like cutting a not short on the end) where it sounds good. Think of your melodies like you're singing them. You can't sing a 16 bar melody without stopping for a breath, so work around that.
Later on, you KIND of do this, but it's a little awkward.
OVERALL: The form is very repetitive, and that gets on my nerves. This is something that tends to happen when you use TabIt. Because everything's already boxed up and outlined for you, there's a ridiculous propensity to copy and paste things over, and over, and over, and over again. You need to break away from this, somehow, while still sounding natural, while maintaining a flow of things.
In the end: Pretty good, keep it up.
I only got to hear one track. So I could only hear one track. But from what I heard, it's pretty good...better than what I can do. :'(
I'll download again and see if it has more songs...
Keep it up!
Quote from: arlen on July 17, 2009, 11:35:33 PM
Piano: Again, same thing, until you go into that piano solo thing. Which is pretty cool, good job with that. One or two sour notes, but oh well.
I was thinking that for one note, I think, but I decided not to mention it because he kept on using the note so I thought he was going for a stylistic thing. :P
Quote
Melody on track 4: Re-work it. Make it like a real wind instrument line. That line would weird to play all in one breath. Add some pauses (like cutting a not short on the end) where it sounds good. Think of your melodies like you're singing them. You can't sing a 16 bar melody without stopping for a breath, so work around that.
Later on, you KIND of do this, but it's a little awkward.
Idk, I've seen some flute players play for long times on end, lol. But when they do, they do that ugly "GASP" sound in order to get all the air they can :( But yeah, phrasing's probably not as easy for people using Tabit (my opinion) because people who use Tabit are most likely to play guitar. And, on guitar, breathing isn't as essential as in other instruments (but it's still important, lol)
Thanks for the help, and not just saying "fine, keep up" =)
I will mend track 2, first i'll try a different instrument.
The abrupt stops in the end for the wind track are just random stops, but..yeah. First I'll get the starting part mended, then the end.
After that, i'll change the strings and after that the bell. Then I'll go for the chords (once everything else is ok)
Edit: (actually its not) I first tried to do the breathing thing. This is there only for the first time it plays(bar 26-33), and I've added two stops before the final one (I dunno wether two are better or one)
Also, i like the second stop better than the first =)
I think after both stops the..err..tune goes in the same way, but I'm not getting a proper way how to fix that
or frame that sentence..
Edit(this time it actually is): First I only tried the stop at bar 30, then I added one after bar 30, but it sucked, so I added one before. But now I think the stop after bar 30 sounded better than the current one.
/confused.
I feel like the stops are too long :P Idk. XP Flute players take breaths but they can do it in a split second with the "HAP!" and mega breath.
EDIT: But I don't really know. I'm not a flute player. Might be better to get back to someone who knows more/better.
No, i actually like the stops. But both the stops have a same way of progressing. try removing the first one and see for yourself.
cowboy =)
Your first chord arpeggio sounds very FFVII-like, lol (might be because I just played it recently. ;-; )
Quote from: Nightwolf on July 18, 2009, 02:56:20 PM
No, i actually like the stops. But both the stops have a same way of progressing. try removing the first one and see for yourself.
cowboy =)
I meant, like, setting the stop to an eighth-beat later or so. :P (late reply ;-; )
I saw your "HOLY SCARY" tbt. Why do people always rick roll around here on their songs? D:<
And whoever did the "Chill Penguin" one did a fine job. :o Even though, for some reason, the strings seem out of tune. :P