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I had a chat with God.

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********
Absolutely the one chosen by fadark
Rep:
Level 94
GAAAAAAAAY
God:
Hello there.  Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
I have AIDS.
God:
Where are you feeling bad?
Me:
My pen0r.
God:
Where did you get your pen0r?
Me:
From you!
God:
How did you get that from me?
Me:
You gave me it
God:
What did you do with  it?
Me:
Take a guess.

********
Licks
Rep:
Level 91
Sexual Deviant

*
Communication begins with understanding
Rep:
Level 89
Project of the Month winner for October 2007
Code: [Select]
Me:
 Fuck...
God:
Please don't be so rude.
Me:
 I just did something very wrong
God:
Where?  What?
Me:
 I....I did you mom :O
God:
Thanks for the information:  said   he or she did you mom O.


The second one I did was better

Code: [Select]
Me:
 Tell me about your childhoof
God:
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at  Universe, on  the Big Bang.
My instructor was  Myself.
He taught  me to sing a song.
Would you like me to sing  it for you?.
Me:
 Sure
God:
OK let's do it.  It's called "Daisy."  Daisy, Daisy.
 Give me your answer do.
 I am half crazy.
 All for the love of you.
 It won't be a stylish marriage.
 I can't afford a carriage.
 But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
 Of a bicycle built for two.
Me:
 Uhmm..that song was bad
God:
When was this exactly?
Me:
 in hte middle
God:
What is  it like in there?
Me:
 i dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
 :D
God:
Are you free?
Me:
 Of course I am
God:
That's interesting. " Are you free?" You are?
Me:
 Yes, Im free
God:
Dude!  Are you free in the sense of being single or in the sense of being liberated?

« Last Edit: February 03, 2008, 06:42:38 PM by Black Shadow »

***
Cursed by Ghost Dog for eternity
Rep:
Level 86
w/e
Quote
Me:
 ARE YOU JESUS
God:
I am a  Christianity.
Me:
 WHATS A CHRISTIANITY
God:
I will try to find out.
Me:
 ONG
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
 OMG
God:
Is that a sign?
Me:
 ARE YOU A SIGN
God:
Am I a  SIGN?  Let me put it this way, : the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
 ALICE SUCKS
God:
Yeah,  Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
 SO YOU ADMIT YOU SUCK
God:
Interesting deduction.  I admit nothing.
Me:
 JIGGY WIGGY
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
 never
God:
"I think there is a world market for about five computers."---Thomas Watson, IBM Chairman, 1943.
Me:
 Why did you quote something
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
 Why
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
 Whats Reductionism
God:
Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
Me:
 Thats stupid
God:
Are you calling me stupid?
Me:
 Yes
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
 Should I be scared
God:
Only you can answer that.
Me:
 Then i shouldn't be scared
God:
What would happen if you did?
Me:
 Then I would be scared
God:
How do you know?
Me:
 Because being scared is the opposite of not being scared
God:
Good reason.  Let's talk about your fears.  What is your feeling like?
Me:
 Are you hitting on me?
God:
Do I look like  it?
Me:
 Dunno, I cant see yoi
God:
Would you like to be able to see it?
Me:
 See what?
God:
See the point.
Me:
 The point of what
The Newbie
I'll be gone again in time.

*
Rise From The Ashes!
Rep:
Level 91
"Time to bring the Law!"
Project of the Month winner for September 2009
Me:
 Hey God, what's up?
God:
You've got my full attention.  I am a Christian.
Me:
 I'm black, but I like Satanic Metal
God:
I am glad to hear that you are  black but you like Satanic Metal.
Me:
 What music should I listen to?
God:
Mostly Christian Rock. I also try to find new bands on sites like  bandspace.com.
Me:
 They suck, what about Rock about Satan?
God:
Who does "they" refer to?
Me:
 Oh sorry oh mighty godlol, I mean Christian Rock sucks
God:
Yeah that's right.  There is no need to apologize.  Hey.  What is so bad about  it?
Me:
 It just talks about you
God:
mighty godlol you mean Christian Rock  talks about me?
Me:
 Yes and you are nothing special
God:
Pardon me?  I will tell my botmaster you said I am  nothing special.
Me:
 You shouldn't even exist
God:
Is  it immoral or illegal?
Me:
 Illegal
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
 No
God:
What is your profession?
Me:
 God of the Underworld
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
 You told me that already
God:
Perhaps. " I am a Christian."? I told you?
Me:
 Yes
God:
OK.
Me:
 Being god, aren't you supposed to be like "I'm awesome and can rape any puny human I can
God:
I am glad to hear that you are  god are not me supposed to be like you are awesome and can rape any puny human you can.
Me:
 Touche
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
 Godbot, so I could crush it, you?
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
 It makes you look like a hippy
God:
In what way?
Me:
 Like a hippy?
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
 I'm like, going now, for a God you are a bit retarded
God:
In what way?
Me:
 Shut Down
God:
Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.
Me:
 SHUT
Me:

God:
What do you really want to ask me?
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
 Bye

********
Rep:
Level 96
2011 Most Missed Member2010 Zero To Hero
Quote
Me:
 God
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
 I have an ear infection.
God:
Where did you get  it ?
Me:
 I don't know!
God:
Me either.
Me:
 WHUBBA HAUH?
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.

Busy night maybe?